Mcfee,
just one question? are you running your server from home, on a windows system? i see you mentioned wamp, so instead of doin all of this bitching about what doesnt work? how bout loading up an old box with linux making it your server load a mail server on it, there are plenty that are free, and run your site from a linux server instead of wamp? that would be my suggestion.

later,
DosDawg